ស្រុកមង្គលបូរី

I'm in Mongkol Borei at my new school.  My apartment is bigger than I expected.  A large wooden door with flowers carved into it opens to a living space and bedroom with a kitchen and bathroom in the back.  After I unpacked and killed the family of roaches living under my bed, I felt right at home.  A parade of school children came by to check out the white person and clean my bathroom and kitchen. 

The school is located near a couple rice paddies, at the end of a dirt (mud now) road.  Small wooden houses, propped on stilts, dot the countryside.  Family members hang in hammocks underneath the houses.  Ducks, cows, chickens, and dogs roam around, looking for food.  I restrained myself from picking up one of the stray dogs or cats today.  But, it's only a matter of time.  I do have two pets already.  Frederico and Juan are the geckos who crawl on my walls. 

I am a bit of a spectacle now; although, I'm sure the villagers will get used to seeing me.  I explored the area this morning.  Children shouted, "Hello!" and giggled as I walked by.  There is a small grocery stall about 10 minutes from the school where I bought some noodles and soda. 

I keep hearing chanting and music, and I located the source today.  There's a monastery about 20 minutes from here.  It's located upon a hill with many steps leading up to a huge golden Buddha statue. 

 

No, I Don't Want a Tuk Tuk Ride or a Boyfriend

"You want tuk tuk?"  All three hundred drivers asked me this during my stay in Siem Reap.  I accepted one ride since it was pouring out, and I had a bag full of vegetables. 

I have made some friends already.  I went to Preah Prom Rath Wat and monastery and met Ch-mii.  That word means dog, and it was fitting. Here is part of our conversation:
C - Do you have boyfriend?
K - No.  (Damn, why did I say no?!)
C - How old are you?
K - Um,.. I have to go now.
C - I love you. 
K - Uh...OK.  Bye.
C - I love you in Cambodia!

Later, I talked to a tuk tuk driver named Rochon.
R - What? You not married?  Why you not married?
K - I don't want to get married.
R - You like Cambodian men?  I know someone you can marry.
K - Oh yeah?  Is his name Rochon?
R - Yes!  We get married, and you stay in Cambodia long time. 
K - No thanks.  I gotta go now. 

 

My favorite interaction was with two young girls.  I found a Mexican restaurant in Siem Reap (Yay!), and was sitting on the patio when they approached me and tried to sell me a book.  I said no because I had already read it.  They sat at a nearby table for a while and returned with a note.  It read:
Hello!  How are you today?  Very nice to meet you.  My name is Chuk and Peach  I give you flower  (There was a drawing of a flower on the back.)  I wish you good luck  I like your smile  you are very nice  am very happy to see you  I have one brother and five sisther  I hope to see you again  can you buy me food  Please I hope you can buy me food.  Please Please Please.  thank you so much  From Chuk and Peach

I thanked them for the note and told them to sit and wait while I ordered something for them.  Chuk said, "We like nachos!"  I laughed and got them some chips and salsa for $1. 

 

Pressure Points

So far, I have had two blind massages.  The first place was kind of sketchy, and there was only one woman there.  When I asked for a massage, she called up a man (I assume her boss) and handed the phone to me.  He spoke English, and we settled on for $5.00 for 1 hour.  Since everyone removes their shoes when entering a building, I did that.  She touched her feet to mine to make sure I had followed the custom.  The place was deserted, and that was good because soon I was lying on a mat in my underwear.  She began with my butt.  Kind of a odd place to start, but whatever.  She pulled my panties up into my butt crack in order to get at the deep tissue.  (Or at least that is what I am telling myself.)  Then, she crawled up on the table, straddled me, and massaged my back.  Things started getting weird when another customer showed up.  I opened my eyes to find a Cambodian man staring at my boobs.  I looked at him and shook my index finger back and forth until he turned over onto his side.  When the massage was over, the blind woman called the man again and handed me the phone.  This time he told me the massage was $7.00.  I raised my voice and objected.  He immediately backed down.  All in all, it was a good massage. 

I found Seeing Hands blind massage today.  I have fond memories of my experience with this company in Nicaragua.  I had a female masseuse, and this massage was unlike any I have ever experienced.  The first thing she did was give me a series of noogies on my head.  Then, she proceeded to grind her thumb up and down my back over and over.  She did the same thing with my arms.  I have the bruises to prove it.  I wondered what the hell was going on.  This was worse than a Thai massage.  Nothing about it felt good.  The torture continued on my legs and feet.  She ended the session with a flurry of Karate chops over the length of my body and some slaps on my back.  When I left I noticed the sign outside said they practice Anma and Shiatsu massage techniques from Japan. 

 

Hello Madam. Someting for you?

Psar Chaa (Old Market) is a bustling shopping area with hundreds of stalls crammed together in a large covered square.  Customers can purchase shoes, jewelry, flowers, scarves, toys, spices, paintings, silver, decorations, a haircut, etc.  My favorite part was the food section in the middle.  My senses were overloaded with the smell of fish, a colorful assortment of fruit and vegetables, and rows of whole chickens with their legs extending upwards to the sky.  After wandering around for an hour, I bought a hand fan and a skirt. 

I planned on returning later to experience the nightlife, but after succumbing to a curry-induced coma with a sprinkle of jet lag, I fell asleep on a hanging wicker chair at my guesthouse. 

 

Kraw-dah

It only took me one hour to do something stupid. On the plane, I got the vegetarian Indian meal which contained fruit, rice, and yellow curry in a bread cup.  I tore off a piece of the bread and put it in my mouth.  That was when I realized it was paper.  I was chewing on...a paper cup.  The Indian man next to me was stared in horror as I tried to nonchalantly spit it in a napkin. 

I'm staying at Smiley's Guesthouse in Siem Reap.  For 8 dollars a night,  I get a bed, ceiling fan, and private bathroom.  It's the all-inclusive type with sink, shower, and toilet crammed into a 3 by 6 foot space.  After saying hello to my old friend, the hose sprayer, I quickly dug a roll of toilet paper out of my backpack.  
 

Happy Sadness

Things I will miss most while in Cambodia:  Tahoe, the girls, Jackson, Owen, understanding what's going on, the desert, George Foreman grill, Rav 4, Mexican food, free refills.

Things I will not miss while in Cambodia:  everything else.

A Turd By Any Other Name...Is Still a Turd

Everyone (and by that, I mean anyone who actually spends their day in a classroom) knows that trying to enforce the same educational standards across the entire country is a bad idea.  Common Core has been getting a lot of bad press lately, so our state Superintendent of Education came up with a solution.  The standards and high stakes tests will remain intact.  However, he changed the term from Common Core to "Arizona College and Career Ready Standards."  Wow, when you say it like that, it really changes things.  I better rethink my stance on this issue. 

It's political logic and semantics like that which led me to walk out of my classroom one fine day and never return.  Teaching at a school in the middle of a rice paddy with no curriculum, no materials, and Cambodian style toilets is more my style. 

 

Exhibit A

A jury summons arrived in the mail today.  I checked the Excuse List, and 'I don't live in the United States' was not an option.   I called the court and said, "Um, I can't go because I'm moving to Cambodia."  I thought they would require some sort of proof, but the lady just told me to send them the form with my new address.  She said they would remove my name of their list permanently. 

I have to admit, it's rather liberating.   Maybe I should feel bad that I can't perform this important civic duty.  Ah, who am I kidding?  Now, I don't have to show up, wait around 6 hours for my name to be called, and then make sure I appear like a real jerk in front of the attorneys, so I don't get selected. 

 

Proudly Awkward

So far, I know about 100 words and phrases in Khmer.  I should be able to converse with a three year old by the time I land in Siem Reap.  I have tricks for remembering the new vocabulary.

Write = Saw-see.  Saucy writing.
Skinny = Sgoom.  Skinny as a broom.
Paper = Kro-dah.  Crawdad.
A little = Bon-dteuk.  Bon bons are little.

Some of the words are fun to say.

Spider = Ping-pleang
Hurry up = Oy lern loung

My favorite time to practice is while I'm hiking.  I carry a scrap of paper with Khmer scribbled on it and walk along, loudly repeating the words over and over, trying to get the pronunciation right, giggling at my ineptitude while attempting to make sounds like tvwo-gaa form on my lips.  When other hikers approach me, they avert their eyes and veer away from the crazy, homeless person.  Ha!  I fooled them.  I'm only crazy.

This is the closest Cambodian name to mine.  It means mountain. 

Sock It

I got the brilliant idea to make a sock puppet to help me teach English.  That way I can demonstrate conversation skills while simultaneously making an ass out of myself.  Now, my last craft project was in 4th grade when I made a Christmas tree out of a phone book. (Remember that?  You fold every page at an angle and glue the ends together to make it tree shaped.  Teachers dig that stuff because it keeps a roomful of kids quiet for 3 days, so they can take care of important duties like sending personal emails or filing their nails.) 

After stealing a sock out of my dad's drawer, I was at a loss.  This situation clearly called for some expertise.  So, I went to Youtube.   The first video featured a teenage boy who began by saying, "This is the first sock puppet I made."  First??  He continued, "I learned a lot from this one, and as you can see my next puppet is much better."  When I stopped laughing, I realized that his puppets were good.  Too good.  They had arms!  Whoa, that was way beyond my skill level.  I found another video that was only 50 seconds long, and was geared for children.  Bingo!  Then, I went hunting around the house for some crap I could glue together to resemble a face. 

My finished product is not going to make the cast of Sesame Street, but it should be a hit with a bunch of first graders in a third world country.  His name is Stinky. 

 

For Riel?

Cambodia's official currency is the riel.  However, American dollars are widely accepted, and Thai baht is also used in the western part of the country.  The current exchange rate is 1 dollar to 4090 riels.  That means a taxi ride could cost 20,000 riels.  Foreign currency always feels like Monopoly money.  It's colorful, has a weird texture, and goes a long way - especially since I am a Mediterranean Ave. kind of girl.







 

I Heart Punctuation

Fun with Language

Some of the words in Khmer seem rather long compared to their English counterparts.  Here are a few examples:

North = dteu khang jeung
green = bpoa-a bai-dtorng
menu = bun-na-rai mook m'hoap
pharmacy = p'dtay-ah llo-uk t'num bpai eti
                                            
 

Holiday in Cambodia

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rV4z8AFUy2Y

Punk rock and Pol Pot = Perfect combination. 

Jum re-ap soo-a (Hello!)

I am learning Khmer (pronounced Ku-my).  So far, I can exchange pleasantries, ask about the toilet, and swear.  What?  Like you aren't curious?

My accent is atrocious and is sure to be a source of amusement for the locals.  The sounds of the language are similar to Thai.  They shove incompatible consonants together like dt or pb.  Some of the words are the same in Thai:  teacher = khru,  food = ah haan, help = chuy.

This is the Khmer alphabet.  They don't use periods, and the end of a sentence is indicated by space.



Are you confused yet?  Yeah, me too.   I'm going to stick with speaking Khmer for now.