During the last couple weeks of my life in Mongkol Borei, I was busy making preparations for leaving my home there and beginning my summer vacation. I went to the Capitol Bus station intending to buy a bus ticket on 7/13. When I got to the front desk, I told the owner that I wanted to go to Phnom Penh. He said," tomorrow?" I laughed and explained that I wanted to leave on 7/24. He looked confused, scratched his head, and started flipping through his handwritten notebook. I could clearly see that he had already written the dates and bus times, and the pages were empty. He said, "No bus." What? There must be a bus on that day. I know that several buses leave every day for Phnom Penh. What's the problem? So I said, "O.K, how about 7/25?" He continued shaking his head. What the heck is going on here? This should not be so difficult. After some thought, he declared, "Three days." Three days? What the hell does that mean? Ooohhhhh...duh! He wants me to buy the ticket 3 days in advance. I am way too early. Another stupid barang blunder. You would think that I would be used to the intricacies of travel in Cambodia, but again, I made a silly error. Who would even think of buying a bus ticket 8 days in advance? Now, that would just be crazy.
For the most part, travelling is great. I get to visit exotic places, see extraordinary things, and take part in new experiences. Yet, there are some aspects that just suck. For example, how come I never get on a bus and think, "Wow, these people smell great! And what is that other aroma? It must be some delicious meal they have brought along for the trip! And they all look so interesting. I can't wait to talk to them. And what a treat. There is a baby in front of me who is not potty trained. Yes! I'm so glad this bus trip is going to be 8 hours long." This is never the case. Never.
I usually travel long distances by public bus because it is cheap, and so am I. The bus is always overcrowded. It's either insanely hot or cold. Cell phones are ringing, and everyone feels the need to have really long, loud conversations. And why oh why do the bus drivers invariably feel the need to blast music or movies at top volume? My standard method of dealing with these wearisome hours are spent either: reading, staring out the window, or reclining my seat that extra two inches in order to lie comatose while hoping we don't careen down a hill in a fiery burst of flames.
I was extremely happy to arrive in Phnom Penh where I ate pizza and spent the night at my Longlin, my favorite guesthouse, before making the 5 hour journey to the beach the following morning.
Luckily, the bus from Phnom Penh to Sihanoukville had about 10 empty seats, and as the only barang, I was able to accomplish one of my usual tricks. I boarded the bus quickly, took up two seats for myself, curled up into a ball, and pretended to be asleep. This plan is often successful in inhibiting any other passengers from attempting to sit next to me. First of all, I'm a barang, and they assume I don't speak any Khmer. Secondly, I'm "sleeping," and it's easier to just sit next to someone who is sitting up and not already hogging two seats.
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